The Gigs

(aka break time Pomodoros)

My last post was a year ago...

My last YouTube video was a year and a half ago...

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If you had told baby undergraduate Ashley that she would someday, in addition to her dream job of teaching Chorus, also be coteaching Band and Musical Theatre and also teaching a Theatre class to sixth graders while trying to finish a dissertation, she would have laughed at you and asked if Dr. J put you up to this to make her do her Orchestration homework.

Yep, those are all my gigs.  Let me break it down for you...

The Chorus Teacher

• Repertoire.  Kids are in chorus to sing chorus songs, so SING SONGS WE DO!
• Technique.  "Sopranos, when you listen to me model these parts, please don't copy my tone."
• Literacy.  We sight sing on the daily, but I also give arrangement projects and written music work to help them understand the abstractions better.  At least, that's what I tell myself when I spend my one metric eternity a week grading that written work.  Also, data, numbers, artifacts...these things make stakeholders happy.
• Logistics.  Our dresses arrived a week *after* the Fall Concert this year YAY AWESOME THANKS BRO.
• Enrichment.  "Hey, wanna learn this piano part so that I don't have to pay an accompanist you can get some more accompanying experience?"
• Scaffolding.  "We're going to do sectionals on this song until Jesus returns.  Godspeed."
• GMEA Stuff.  "You guys live an hour away, but you can totally be at my school by 4:00 for the second audition, right?"
• Saying Yes.  "Yes you have to sing today."  "Yes those really are your notes with all the leger lines on them."  "Yes I expect you to sing that high you JUST DID IN WARM UPS MANNNN"

The Assistant Band Director

• Clerical assistance.  "Just give me all your grades.  Just hand me a big stack of numbers."
• Scaffolding.  "One two three four one RATCHET three four one two TRIANGLE TRIANGLE"
• Accompanying.  "I can play like 80% of that kit part, so can I play it at the concert?"
• Super Helpful Feedback.  "...you gave them a visual in which they have to count to three 47 times?"
• Entitlement.  "Assistant Band Director coming through to claim her two free slices of pizza!"
• Saying No.  "No you may not go to the bathroom on the other side of the stadium by yourself."  "No I will not give you the scissors for 'something fun'."  "No that is not a line.  That is also not a line.  GEEZ LOUISE HOW DO YOU NOT SEE THAT THIS IS NOT A LINE???"

The Assistant Drama Teacher

• Teaching vocal notes.  "These are your parts."
• ...LOL JK NOPE.  "These are the parts you're going to sing because the ones these Broadway people wrote are ridiculous and also nothing like the cast recording."
• Clerical assistance.  "Just give me all your grades.  Infinite Campus and I are best friends."
• Occasional accompaniment.  "Enjoy this bassline because that's all you're getting with this Sondheim junk."
• Admonishing.  "Memorization doesn't happen by just wishing really hard."
• Waiting.  Waiting for everyone to show up to rehearsal, waiting for the technical director to help the kids find the right lighting cue, waiting for the performance tracks to finally upload through the school firewall.
• Saying Stop.  "Stop swaying."  "Stop singing melody, altos."  "Stop talking."  "Stop messing with the [insert funnest prop here]." 

The Middle School Teacher

• Theatre Games.  "GUYS.  It's not fun for the rest of us if you only pass the Zip Zap Shebang between the four of you!"
• Acting and Performing.  "If the words look normal and come after your character's name, it's your line.  If the words are all slanty like this, they're stage directions and they tell you what to do."
• Theatre Terminology. "Simon says walk downstage.  Simon says cross right.  Move to center AYOOOOOOOOO!"
• Generating a Script.  Which at this age breaks down thusly: 50% stories about broken bones, 30% stories about getting a pet, 10% everyday stories, 10% stories that will rip your heart out like "When I Got Adopted" or "When My Grandfather Died."
• Producing a Tiny Play.  "I appreciate the offer, but I think your dad might find it a little disproportionate to construct a homemade hand-carved oak desk for a group of 25 sixth graders to perform a 20-minute segment of My Fair Lady around."
• Saying Wow.  "Wow, your puppy is cute!"  "Wow, your shirt, shorts, socks and shoes are all the same shade of neon green!"  "Wow, the tooth you just pulled certainly did produce a lot of blood!"

The Doctoral Candidate

• Begging for Survey Responses.  No seriously guys, please fill out my survey.
• Trying to write up events that happened months ago while you were also trying to help band kids step their left foot on 1 and 3.
• Being asked when I'll be done.  "Well, my goal is [insert a year's time from when question is being asked.]
• Saying Sorry.  "Sorry it took me so long to finish this."  "Sorry it took me so long to email you back."  "Sorry this looks so terrible."

And then there's proctoring state tests, playing for church, exercising, attempting to be a decent friend and wife with varying degrees of success...

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That's why I haven't posted anything anywhere in forever.  And the honest truth is...I've never been happier in my life.  I am surrounded by wonderful people who inspire me and treat me with kindness.  If you had told baby undergraduate Ashley that her dream of just having that Bachelor's and teaching Chorus was not anywhere near big enough, I don't think she would have believed you.

Some days, I still don't believe it.